Pastor, husband, and father of four, Voddie Baugham Jr., author of bestselling, Family Driven Faith, writes on the crisis of fatherhood in America. The book is directed toward Christian parents and fathers, in particular. His focus, "...fathers have a God-given responsibility to see... that their daughters marry well and that their sons become worthy husbands."
In his book, Baugham writes fathers have the responsibility to model and teach "biblical manhood" to their sons, and look for those attributes in their daughter's future marriage partners. He believes honorable and trustworthy young men, trained in spiritual leadership, are in short supply because of the multigenerational legacy of divorce and single-parent homes. He suggests in chapter ten, if your daughter can't find such a man, fathers can "build one," by mentoring such biblical qualities in young men she dates.
Marriage is the key to families and multigenerational restoration, writes Baugham, and it begins with courtship. He urges parents to spend at least as much time preparing their children for marriage, as they do preparing them for school, work, and college.
Baugham compares Christians and America's post-Christian culture to the Jewish exiles the prophet Jeremiah instructed. While Jewish exiles lived in foreign lands, worshipped foreign gods, and intermarried with pagans, today the United States almost mirrors them and is often hostile to the things of God. For instance, American citizens now intermarry with non-Christians and those who worship other faiths. He also cites examples of post-Christian culture, such as—barring the Ten Commandments from public buildings, forbidding use of the word "Christmas," and the California Senate Bill 1437 that forbids the terms "mother" and "father" being exclusive to parents.
The first half of the book explains the author's vision, its multigenerational aspects, and why he considers marriage both a ministry, and a fertile training ground for leadership. Chapters four through eight explore the qualities parents and daughters should look for in future spouses, and why the same qualities need to be instilled in sons. Baugham anecdotally writes, "Our culture overly romanticizes marriage," then describes modern dating as a "glorified divorce practice."
He uses statistics and personal experience to explore the biblical model of marriage and manhood, and describes the importance of a father's spiritual influence. He stresses early childhood training with biblical truth to counter cultural influence and conditioning, then notes the qualities he describes are in short supply in America.
Ten chapters challenge readers to consider the biblical model of training, marriage and parenting that feature virtues of holiness, gentleness, compassion and a solid work ethic. The writing is straightforward and easy-to-read, although some might find his ideas controversial.
Baugham's ideas of scriptural modeling, and families a priority second only to God, and could rebuild family foundations destroyed by divorce. I encourage Christian parents to read this book and give copies to their children. It could change their views on courtship, dating, and marriage.
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What He Must Be...If He wants to Marry My Daughter, by Voddie Baugham Jr., Crossway Books, 2009, 216 Pages, ISBN-13: 978-1581349306, $15.99
www.crossway.com
